Thursday, January 20, 2011

American Idol Season 10

Though I vowed to never watch American Idol again after Simon's departure I reluctantly tuned in (okay, I anxiously tuned in because I love the auditions).
I am totally convinced that 60% of the people who audition are on heavy drugs, there are about 30% who have no friends at all, and finally the 10% that make it through has some type of potential.
Although, I must admit that there were quite a few to make it through to Hollywood, some that perhaps shouldn't have? For instance, Jersey girl with the stars on boobs aka Tiffany Rios. There was a lot of camaraderie amongst the judges. They convinced each other to vote "yes"...to chummy if you ask me. Jennifer Lopez found it a bit difficult to say "no", Steven Tyler tried to embody the Simon Cowell effect, and Randy had no dogs, what's up with that?

At the end of the day, the show was decent...it lacks that stern sense of sarcasm that we loved so much during the audition phase. We miss you Simon!

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

In the Spirit of the Upcoming Championship Games...

Troy Polamalu

Let the games begin!

No Thank You?

Okay see me and the significant other are now at a point where we share e-mail passwords I totally have nothing to hide, or at least that's what I thought.

Lately there has been a large amount of what should be junk in my e-mail inbox. Allow me to clarify, it seems as if all of the Viagra, Cialis, and Vicerex gets pass my spam filters. Not to mention I have the Yahoo! app on my phone which sends me a notification every time a message is received.

The conversation usually goes a little something like this, the mister starts out with "babe, your phone went off...I think you have an e-mail." I check my inbox and respond, "oh it's nothing." He says, "let me see" and snatch the phone to read "Enlarge you penis today!."

I think that at some point  I may need to show him my birth certificate.

Doesn't Pfizer have a marketing department? I mean I'm no advertising exec, but I think it's fair to say your barking up the wrong tree here! Sheesh, I'm sure Jimmy Johnson has a Yahoo account, go bother him.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Get In on the Vegas Deals


With Jay-Z and Coldplay playing the New Year’s Eve Grand Opening, the Cosmopolitan has lived up to everyone’s expectations thus far. Ritz and glamour aside, if you’re anything like me, shelling out a minimum of $200 per night is a bit much.
Living on the east coast, I have come to love the Vegas lifestyle and I take a trip out west every year. I engulf completely in everything that Vegas has to offer, food, shows, gambling, nightlife, and did I mention drinks?
The Cosmopolitan has created perks for the traveler on a budget. Leading up to the Cosmo’s soft opening on December 15th, I received e-mail promotions from the newly remodeled Tropicana Hotel Las Vegas, MGM Resorts, and Harrah’s (now Caesars Entertainment Corp) offering rates at a 40-60% discount.
Now may be the best time to get over to Vegas while the buzz is still hot on the Cosmo. Competitors are trying to win your business. Get in on the deals before the novelty of the Cosmopolitan wears off.

Article first published as Now May Be A Good Time to Travel to Vegas on Technorati.

Friday, January 14, 2011

Split the Bill or Split?

So a friend calls you up and invite you out to dinner on Friday night, you accept. If you're anything like me you will give yourself a maximum budget before arriving at the restaurant.
You skip the soft drink and opt for water instead, no appetizer for you, the grilled chicken entree should fill you up.
So far, you have spent $12.99, a $5.99 glass of wine wouldn't hurt.
Meanwhile at the other end of the table, there's that infamous friend who orders the most expensive appetizer, she goes for the steak and shrimp surf and turf, and did I mention drinks...shots anyone?
At the end of the night between the four of you, the bill has come to $150.00, should you split the bill?
As innocent as it may appear there are people who like to take advantage of the occasional group outing. They order the priciest thing on the menu because they know that essentially they don't have to foot the whole bill.
Is it fair for you to pay $37.50 for grilled chicken and a glass of wine? I didn't think so. Keep this in mind the next time you go out, ask for separate checks before placing your order this will save you money and the friend with extravagant taste buds will think twice before ordering the Maine lobster.

In The Name of Fame

In the past year, there have been more and more attacks “caught” on camera, mainly cell phone cameras. Conveniently enough the video is uploaded onto sites such as Youtube for all to view and comment. Random? I think not. Teens are resorting to barbaric behavior to get that 15 minutes of ’fame’ and I use the term loosely.

Back in September, 17 year old Rachel Griffith was beat relentlessly in a planned attack by a group of her peers. She suffered multiple blows to the head. The assault was recorded on a cell phone and passed around for everyone to see.

What makes one resort to such savage measures? I don’t know the answer to that, but I do know that threat isn’t limited to teenagers.

Take the case of Allen Haywood, while reading at the L’Enfant Plaza Metro in Washington, DC he was attacked by a teenage a girl. Repeatedly punched in the head while another girl tossed his belongings over the rail. Haywood screamed demanding the girl to stop. He yelled “I did nothing to you!” The attack occurred just after rush hour with plenty of bystanders. What is disturbing is the fact that multiple witnesses had cell phones out, no one called the police. I guess you can’t make an outgoing call while recording video.

The ‘attack and record’ trend is growing rapidly and something needs to be done soon. We are at a very bad point when we get our kicks off of watching someone being brutally beaten. The only good thing to come of this is that the videos will provide law enforcement with solid evidence.


Article first published as All In The Name of Fame on Technorati.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Lee Dewyze Pants on the Ground and Simon's Out!


Well, well, well this season is finally over. Congrats Lee! The finale had it's ups and downs...I mean really Dane Cook? I was excited to see the Bee Gees. Janet sounded so much like her brother. Paula was umm, I'll get back to you on that. The best performance by far was Larry Platt with "Pants on the Ground." I can literally go on and on but I won't. I can honestly say that I am glad that Crystal didn't win, her arrogance rubbed me the wrong way. Lee was humble throughout the whole season and I hope that he has a wonderful career. With that said, I am done with American Idol, I will miss you Simon!

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Space Romance

So I was watching the History Channel late last night. The documentary was called "The Universe: Sex In Space." Hmmm...this outta be interesting I thought. Interesting indeed! Vanna Bonta, is the creator of the "2Suit" and the 2Suit was created for a couple who wants to have intimacy in zero gravity. The 2suit opposes Newton's law of motion, for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. The suit has 2 Velcro strips where two people can connect and have sex in space. Usually after watching the History Channel I feel a bit more informed. However, this particular documentary left me with more questions.

The average Joe couldn't just go to Expedia and purchase a Space Shuttle flight, so who exactly was the 2Suit created for? I mean really I don't think there are too many horny Astronauts...but then again remember Lisa Nowak and the NASA love triangle?

Monday, May 24, 2010

Why So Serious?

Okay I will be the first to admit my addiction to facebook. I play everything from Sorority Life to Cafe World. I have been a user of facebook since 2005, you know when it was only available to college students. I used it to update class schedules. As far as using it is a social network, for me the novelty has worn off. I realize that most people use Facebook to stalk keep in touch with friends. Unfortunately everyone has an opinion and facebook forces you to read them. I have received phone calls from adults over 30+ asking why I didn't respond to their wall post???? I have had relatives DELETE me...I wonder how pissed they would be to see me at a family function?! That delete button didn't work as good as you thought it would eh? I digress. The point is try not to take things so personally, after all it's just Facebook!

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Adventures of Inauguration


Getting to the inauguration yesterday was a true journey. I intended on going to the Parade route along Pennsylvania Avenue, hmm let's just say that didn't work out as planned.
I stood at Rhode Island Ave Metro for about 30 minutes there was a distorted message that kept coming over the speakers, no one knew what the muttered voice was saying. Suddenly, a voice says loud and clear "the red line is experiencing delays; a passenger was struck by a train at Gallery Place." My sister looked at me, "well we're going to have to park and Ma's house and walk." My mom lives in the capitol hill area.  My feet were already frozen and it was already about 9:20.
After about a 15 minute walk, there stood the Capitol I started to get happy, 'yes' I thought to myself. We outsmarted the tourists! Unfortunately there were the national guard. "Get on the sidewalk and walk to the left!" Just what I didn't want a Detour.
By the time we finished walking we were at the monument, but we were late and we couldn't get anywhere near a jumbo tron. We started to walk back towards the capitol, with minor delays; my sister wanted to stop at every booth and table to get Obama-rabilia, as if she were a tourist.
We ended up on the south side of the Capitol, there were no screens on that side (why wouldn't they put jumbo trons all around???) We could hear the crowd chanting "Obama, Obama" I looked at my cell phone it was 11:17...I knew that this wasn't going to work. We walked towards Eastern Market, and voila...there was a TV screen outside of a law office. What was a group of about 5 people quickly turned into a group of 50 or more. People were in the middle of the street and across the street trying to watch a 40' flat screen t.v. There was a news reporter from channel 6 news (I have no idea of what city or state). There was a vendor who was very disgruntled, while President Obama was being sworn in, he cursed "Nobody wants to buy sh*t, everyone wants to look at the f*cking TV." Despite his ignorance, and him cursing at an onlooker...things were pretty smooth.
 Tears were flowing and random strangers hugging each other. I was so proud of what I was witnessing, and I was very happy that I convinced my sister to come along...that is until I realized that I had to walk about 16 blocks to get back home.

Friday, January 16, 2009

Too Close for Comfort



Sardines, wolves, and Honda lovers—just a few things that usually come in packs. Well now, add Washingtonian commuters to that list. I can remember when I was a little grasshopper in Social Studies class. We were reading about Japan and there was a picture of their rail system in Tokyo. The train was so crowded that officers in white gloves were outside of the train doors pushing people in so that everyone could fit. I pointed and laughed with my friends at how ridiculous that looked. I haven't been on the metro in a few years so imagine my surprise when I get to the station after a long, tiresome day. "All I want to do is get home", I thought. I waited impatiently on the platform while the train made it's screeching approach and good lord—the train was absolutely packed. I told myself I was getting on the train, somehow…and I did effortlessly since I'm no bigger than a minute. There was about a quarter of a centimeter leftover, enough space to comfortably fit an ant. Apparently, eight other people told themselves the same thing (some of whom fit into the category of "large-and-in charge"). What the hell?! I had to turn into a contortionist just to remain grounded. Now my hair was stuck in the door, my breast were pressed against some one's back, some guy had his elbow directly in my ribcage, a pregnant lady had her stomach on my thigh (the baby kicked twice) and I could've sworn someone was palming my ass. This was ridiculous! What had changed in a matter of a few years? I'm not going to point the finger *ahem* condos, but there needs to be a solution: either cutback on the number of jobs in the city or stop building condominiums! There are more condos sprouting up in the city than plants in the Amazon. These pricey apartments are cramming thousands of people into the city and surrounding areas and interfering with the once reliable transportation system. Please, think about the native Washingtonians—I'm being groped on the metro for goodness sake!

Wondermom!

So I was reading a story about the French Justice Minister Rachida Dati who has returned to work just five days after giving birth to her first child via C-section, a baby girl named Zohra. Dati was spotted at the Elysee Palace in heels! Now I'm no pregnantologist, but is this lady serious? Five days! I’m all for being a career mom--alpha woman rah, rah-- but this lady is taking it too far. She probably was sitting in the Monday morning meeting, stitches busting, bleeding through her shirt--eww. Maybe it’s best this lady did have a C-section because if she had a natural birth she would’ve been walking around with placenta hanging out her ying-yang. I can’t help but to question her parenting skills. God forbid her little girl breaks her ankle on a soccer field, she’ll take her to get a cask….then drive her right back to the game saying “Now make mommy proud”. Obviously, her priorities are ordered: a) work, b.) more work, and c.) didn’t I have a kid or something a few days ago? Maybe it’s just my own biased opinion, but I think a bedside feeding is more important than a cabinet meeting. I don’t know how long this android women has been away from Krypton, but if I just had a kid I would be laying in my bed doped up on some morphine.

Sure I'll Cash Your Fraudulent Checks for You...


In this unstable and unpredictable economy many of us are searching for new employment. We post our resumes on job boards such as Monster, Career Builder, and my favorite Craig's List. Now it is bad enough that a receptionist is required to possess 7+ years experience, a Master's, and two certifications only to make $10 per hour. We now have to deal with the following foolery:

"Hi, I saw your ad at www.craigslist.com so i thought i should contact you so as to know if you will be interested in my offer. I come to the states often mostly for business purposes because i deal mostly in jewelry. I supply watches,bracelets,wedding rings and jewelry to stores in the states and europe .Infact that is my family business because we are from Switzerland.Unfortunately my father passed away on the 30th of september 2007 and as the only son in my family i had to go and take care of the family business back in Geneva,Switzerland and i realised that it will be very difficult to supply goods to my clients again in the United states while am away and it will definitely cost me a lot to come over to receive payments because they pay mostly in checks and money orders .So to run the business from there it will be difficult and will be impossible especially the aspect of payment and i dont also want to lose my clients or customers there ...."

Hmm, I don't know why I am not buying this...maybe it's the grammar or possibly the fact that this was sent from a hotmail account, perhaps it's because 'Pedro' sent it (that doesn't sound Swiss at all). In any event Mr. Pedro, If I were to compromise my freedom by cashing bogus checks and money orders I definitely would not send the money to you; I would keep it all instead of the $1200 per month that you suggested in your e-mail. I think I am gonna have to say no thanks to this one.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Damn Birds!


CNN reports that US Airways flight 1549 was forced to make an emergency landing in the Hudson River due to a bird strike. Now, this is no attempt by me to become a credible news source. I am glad that everyone on board is alive and accounted for. With that said, I will get to the topic at hand...Evil Terrorist Birds. It is important to mention that at the tender age of 12, I was attacked by a flock of Sea Gulls. I remember it like it was yesterday, I was on the boardwalk in Rehoboth Beach, Delaware I was set to tear into some Boardwalk fries...but the Sea Gulls were ready to tear into me. They pecked at my braids, continuously flew around me until I gave up and tossed my fries in the trash. These fowl are getting really foul! Taking down commercial airliners, wreaking havoc on unsuspecting beach goers, and worst of all crapping on your windshield while you're at work trying to make an honest living... I don't know about you, but I have had enough!

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Misunderestimated?


Do not frown upon me, don't look down your nose at the ignorance that is the title to this blog entry. "Misunderestimated" is a term coined by our brilliant and intellectual current President, George Dubya (yeah, I know I started the countdown too). When I was first acquainted with Bushisms, I was frequently checking Webster's, after all he is my commander-in-chief...if he says something it must be to my knowledge, politically correct right? hmmm, I digress. I was appeased to see that Mr. President stayed true to form throughout his 8 years... despite everyone misunderestimating him. In his final press conference as President of the United States he stated, and I quote, "Umm, sometimes didn't like the stories that you wrote or reported on. Sometimes you, umm, misunderestimated me." Tsk Tsk. He has experienced a fair share of obtuseness throughout his two terms, but I must say that 'misunderestimated' is one of my favorite Bushisms, right along with 'commiserate'!